Meltdown in Milan – Episode 10
Last week’s episode left me with more to be desired – all of the drama happened within the first 10 minutes and the rest was a total snooze fest. But this is how you edit an episode. A girl’s trip with a slow buildup of tension and then boom, a total scream match explosion that included glasses flying and name-calling, and then a few more scenes to process the aftermath. The drama is getting a little repetitive – the cake, the fashion show, the Hitler comment. If you break it down, there’s really not much there. But at least there’s drama and after coming off of the long and painfully dull season of Orange County, I’ll take drama anywhere I can get it.
The ladies are all packing for Milan and complaining to their husbands about how awkward it’s going to be after the drama at the Posche Fashion Show. Blah, blah, blah. It’s the same exact conversations that we’ve already been hearing and will continue to hear all throughout this episode. But when the ladies land in Milan, everyone is acting like the fashion show didn’t happen. It seems to be a pretty civil trip and there are no arguments on the bus ride to the hotel. Once everyone gets their rooms, they split off and go their separate ways.
Danielle and Teresa go out for drinks, Siggy and Dolores go shopping, and Melissa and Margaret head to a clothing show room so Melissa can pick out some hideous pieces for her boutique. Everyone is gossiping about the tension in the group. Teresa and Danielle are mad at Dolores for not sticking up for Teresa against Kim D and not apologizing for it. At least Siggy came to Teresa and explained her point of view. Dolores has been radio silent. And Teresa and Melissa are both upset that Dolores got up in Melissa’s face like a crazy person.
Dolores doesn’t trust Danielle’s intentions with Teresa and thinks it’s weird that they’re so buddy buddy after all of this time hating each other. And Siggy’s really upset about Margaret’s Hitler comment and thinks that it was insensitive. Everyone has issues with everyone and shit’s gonna pop off soon. Like Melissa said, “It’s a ticking time bomb.”
Later, everyone goes back to their rooms to decompress and get ready for dinner. The teams switch up but still sit around and talk about the same thing over and over. Margaret is preparing for Danielle’s arrival by popping some champagne – only problem is she has no idea what she’s doing. She’s terrified to open the bottle and when she does it overflows and goes everywhere – as champagne commonly does. It was hilarious!
Over in the next room, Teresa and Melissa are meeting up to discuss their days and the Posche drama. Melissa thinks that cathedrals and large churches only exist in Rome. This chick needs to get out of Jersey more often. What a dumbass.
The entire group heads out to dinner and everything seems copasetic. The drinks are flowing and everyone’s joking and laughing. And then Soggy has to go and ruin it all by bringing up the elephant in the room. She claims that she always stands up for Melissa and Teresa and that she definitely did in this situation. Melissa shows how she feels by doing the exercise they learned at Siggy’s retreat. She pretends to be Dolores and screams in Teresa’s face like Dolores did to her. And Dolores doesn’t really apologize but says that she feels bad about it.
Danielle joins in and asks why Siggy didn’t stand up for the girls in front of them – when Teresa was fighting with Kim D. Instead of providing an answer, Siggy completely changes the topic to Margaret. Projecting much? She thinks that Teresa and Melissa should have stuck up for her when Margaret made her Hitler comment. Margaret is totally shocked to be brought into the conversation and stands by her comments. Even Danielle gets it – it was an analogy! It may have been an insensitive analogy but Siggy is also overly sensitive – especially to anything that comes out of Margaret’s mouth.
Siggy is really going in on Margaret and not letting anyone else get a word in. She says that Margaret hates Jews and everyone freaks out because she has Jewish children. But Siggy continues to go even deeper by calling Margaret anti-Semitic. OMG! This broad needs to get a grip – up the dose of pellets doc. The girls are completely shocked, Margaret is crying and shaking, and Danielle tries to coin a new catchphrase, “That’s OL – off limits!” Was that really necessary Danielle? Just say “off limits” you OL – old lady.
Danielle starts going at Siggy in defense of Margaret who is too shocked and upset to speak. Siggy just keeps telling Danielle to shut up – no you shut up – no you shut the F up. Wow. Danielle finally loses it and starts picking up anything she can find on the table and flinging it around. She has the common sense not to throw anything but glassware and drinks are still flying everywhere. Teresa has to drag Danielle away as she screams “Whore!” (sounded like “whooorah!”) in a classic Jersey tough guy voice.
Dolores looks ready to mess someone up and has to be stopped by Melissa. And Siggy is still yelling about nothing for all the restaurant to hear and Melissa has to physically cover her mouth to shut her up. The groups wisely divide so everyone can cool down. But Siggy and Dolores are again more upset that Melissa and Teresa didn’t stick up for them in this situation. Stick up for them??? How could anyone defend that behavior? Siggy was acting like a complete crazy person! And granted, Danielle lost it also, but Siggy threw out the first jab by labelling Margaret anti-Semitic.
The next morning everyone is still trying to process what happened. Melissa has planned a tour of the canal but Siggy and Danielle stay back at the hotel. Siggy decides to meet up with Danielle to apologize for dismissing her. Being dismissed or rejected is a trigger point for Danielle. She admits that she saw red and took things too far. But she again stands up for Margaret saying that the Hitler reference was just an analogy and not meant to be hurtful. Look at you Danielle being a good friend.
The other ladies are out being tourists along the canal with their cute tour guide. The ladies have lunch and Dolores is still sticking up for Siggy’s crazy behavior. She doesn’t think that Margaret is anti-Semitic but that she’s anti-Siggy. I think we all are at this point. Teresa makes the observation that Dolores hasn’t been giving Margaret a fair shot because of her allegiance to Siggy.
And Siggy is back at the hotel, still upset and venting to “MICHAEL CAMPANELLA!”. His advice is to pull a Vicki and avoid everything by heading home. Real mature – great advice “MICHAEL CAMPANELLA!”. But he doesn’t really ask her to come home, he tells her. And she agrees. Girl bye! Maybe now the ladies can have some fun on this trip.
But as we see in next week’s previews, Siggy is unfortunately still in Milan. There’s a lot more discussion about the events up to this point and Margaret and Siggy talk one on one. My hope is that they can patch it up, move on, and go out and get fun drunk together. They never let loose on New Jersey – everything is always so serious! Y’all are on vacation! Pull a LuAnn and fall in the bushes, pull a Kyle and do the splits while whipping your hair around, pull a Tamra and dance on a cab. In the words of the OG, “Whoop it up!”