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Real Housewives of New Jersey Episode 2 Recap

Let Them Eat Cake – Episode 2

This episode had a slow build up but the end result was worth it.  I really didn’t need the filler of tennis and swim lessons.  Girl’s trips are not the time for filler.  But once we got to the explosive dinner, I was having a hard time keeping up.  The insults were being hurled from all directions and that’s how it should be in Jersey. 

Cake Gate

The episode picks back up exactly where it left off – cake gate.  Siggy is on her hands and knees picking up the destroyed cake and cleaning up the mess.  She is upset that they ruined such a beautiful creation and that they embarrassed her.  But she’s also drunk so she gets a little out of hand.  She calls them “animals” and says they have a low IQ – fighting words. 

cake

Yoga and Tears

The next morning the ladies head to the beach for a yoga sesh – sans Siggy and Dolores.  Danielle shows off her amazing flexibility and as Melissa says, “That why she was engaged 19 times!”

yoga

Out of the blue, Margaret gets a delivery – it’s some giant wreath made out of white roses.  She says that it’s some tradition and has all the ladies write notes to their passed loved ones and then read them out loud.  Everyone was sobbing while reading their notes and I can’t… I can’t.  It brings me down. 

yoga 3

More Tears Over a Cake

Siggy and Dolores go off on their own and Siggy is still really pissed about the night before.  She literally starts crying in the middle of a restaurant because of a cake.  She’s crying over a cake!  She needs to get it together – it is not that serious.  Siggy is acting a little bipolar this season – high highs and low lows. 

sig rest

Filler

Everyone eventually meets up to go over to Siggy’s friend’s house.  The car ride to this house is super tense and awkward.  No one is talking to each other or backing down.  Siggy is hurt that the ladies acted disrespectfully towards her by ruining the cake and making a scene in the restaurant.  Melissa and Teresa think that they were just having fun, it wasn’t that big of a deal, and Siggy needs to apologize for name calling.  But both sides refuse to talk to each other. 

car

They arrive at the friend’s house and Siggy has to give the ladies a lecture before crossing the threshold.  She basically tells them to behave and not embarrass her.  The rest of the ladies are super annoyed with her for speaking to them like children.  Melissa and Teresa don’t even want to be there anymore but suck it up. 

house

They have lunch and Danielle talks about the beautiful rose ceremony that Margaret planned for them.  Siggy is upset that Margaret didn’t call her to tell her about the ceremony since Siggy is the one who planned the trip and invited Margaret into the group.  Dolores is upset that she wasn’t there to support Teresa, who she’s known since she was 16. 

lunch

Siggy, Dolores, and Margaret have a tennis lesson – real exciting stuff.  I did not need to see these ladies in tennis skirt and all of the bending over.

tennis

Meanwhile, Teresa is having a swim lesson while Danielle and Melissa watch.  Is this a normal vacation activity?  So random.  The hot swim instructor slowly takes his shirt off as Teresa stares.  This is the shady “cheating” scene Bravo has been pushing in all of the trailers.  Really Bravo?  I don’t like that trickery.  Danielle is cracking herself up with her innuendos, “Was it hard?  I mean the lesson.”  But unfortunately, her humor goes straight over Teresa’s head. 

swim

Shrine to Siggy

That night Siggy has dinner at her Boca home.  First thing when you walk in the door is a huge shrine for Siggy – literally 15 framed photographs hanging on the wall.  It was soooo ridiculous and over the top!  She also had a giant print out of her book in her living room which screams “promote, promote, promote!”

dinner 3

Siggy tells the girls that she was waiting for an apology from them this morning.  Melissa is in shock and can’t believe Siggy’s behavior.  Melissa and Teresa want an apology from Siggy for calling them “animals” and saying they have a low IQ.

dinner 5

But Siggy denies ever saying those things and Dolores sticks by her side even when Teresa calls her out.  Margaret jumps in, “Who cries about a cake?  Who?!! Oh, Soggy Flicker that’s who.”

dinner

Siggy is totally talking down to them and can’t understand how they don’t understand where she’s coming from. “Want me to talk to you like a kindergarten teacher?”  And then Siggy uses Danielle’s trigger word, “trash”.  Awww hell no!  She doesn’t know the horror that’s about to unleash on her ass.  You gone and done it now.  Drags her Danielle.

dinner 8

Danielle gets the scary/crazy look on her face (the same look that LeeAnne Locken has perfected) and points at Siggy, “Do not use that word in my presence! I’m not trash, she’s not trash, she’s not trash, and she’s not trash!  How dare you!”

dinner 7

Melissa is over the whole thing and storms off.  And I’m glad she did – she doesn’t need to deal with this abuse on her birthday.  Teresa follows Melissa out and Margaret and Danielle are close behind. 

dinner 6

Predictions

Next week Siggy goes on a tirade to try to take Margaret down.  But Margaret was smart – she knew who to get in close with right out of the gate.  Siggy is replaceable – Teresa is not.  I’m not really sure what Margaret did directly to Siggy, besides calling her “Soggy” which was hilarious. 

Episode 1

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