The Dubrovnik Wedgie
This episode was so amaze balls!!! There was so much juicy drama! Between the overly difficult guests and the high winds, to Wes finally making a lead deckhand decision that threw the other crew members into disarray, to the love triangle finally boiling over and causing a physical altercation in the streets of Croatia… all of it was genius!
Lead Deckhand Decision
The show starts exactly where we left off with last week’s cliffhanger: Wes and Captain Sandy in the bridge waiting for the decision on a lead deckhand. And Wes chooses….. Malia! Oh shit! Wes tells Malia that she is officially promoted to lead deckhand but specifically uses the words “we decided” – as in himself and Captain Sandy. Oh no, Wes… this decision was all on you… don’t try to blame Captain.
While the guests are eating dinner, the wind really picks up and the anchor starts dragging. Captain Sandy decides to head back to port and somehow docks the boat in both the dark and the high winds.
Chef what’s-his-face’s dinner actually looks super high end and legit – way to finally do your job dude. The wind is still really bad the next morning and Captain decides that they will not be leaving the dock. The guests are disappointed and still really wanted to go to the beach – it’s 50 degrees!
So Hannah arranges for a tour of Split and massages back on the boat. This is unacceptable to one guest who apparently has more important things to do and she flies out early. But not before throwing a huge fit – it’s not like it’s anyone’s fault, Captain Sandy can’t control the weather.
Wes announces to the team that Malia is going to be the lead deckhand and Bobby takes it surprisingly well (at first). Malia brings up the topic again to Bobby but they all still think that Captain had a say in the decision.
But then genius Malia confesses to Bugs that she and Wes kissed while on anchor duty… and who is outside overhearing all this scandalous information? Lauren! And thank God!!! And what does sweet, wonderful Lauren do? Tell everyone of course, duh! Yaaass Lauren! Stir that pot girl! Spill that tea! I mean who wouldn’t? This gossip is just too damn juicy!
So now everyone doubts Malia’s merits and the reason behind why she received a promotion. Bobby is getting more angry the more he talks about it but also can’t stop talking about it. He is gonna pop off at any second and lose his shit.
Max and Bobby confront Wes about the rumors and he admits it but stands strong in his decision that Malia deserved it base on her work ethic.
Malia and Bobby battle it out – Malia is defending her hard work and Bobby says he doesn’t want to take away from that but it’s still not fair to him having more experience on yachts. Malia’s upset that she’s pretty, “So because I’m a cute, attractive deckhand.” Max isn’t buying it, “It has nothing to do with your looks, it’s the fact that you made out with your boss.” But Malia doesn’t know that they know that yet….
So far, everyone has wisely been keeping the secret about Wes and Malia from Chef what’s-his-face so that he doesn’t get distracted from the high pressure guests. But the second they’re off the boat Saint Lauren spills the beans and man does it tear him up.
He confronts Wes and Malia in the bridge in what was the most awkward thing I’ve seen since Tinsley’s date on New York last week. He gets right in Malia’s face, “How do you sleep at night?” He’s pissed at Malia for leading him on, which she denies. But there’s more to their story than we’ve seen and Chef has the receipts to prove it!
The Real Story
Chef vents to Bugs and tells her that him and Malia had meet before the season and hooked up. Malia has also been texting him this whole time on the down low!!! And she was legit leading him on!
She was saying things about not being into Wes and wanting to meet up at a hotel after the season was over. Oh Malia…. shady shady shady. So she’s been telling the cameras one thing, (that she doesn’t want either guy) acting a different way (with Wes) and then low key stringing Chef along (via text). That is lowdown dirty!
S**t Hits the Fan!
Out on the down Chef what’s-his-face is chugging drink after drink in a desperate attempt to drown his Malia sorrows. Bobby is still complaining how unfair it all is and everyone’s favorite buddy comes strolling up… Wes.
They all walk through the streets and by this point Chef is hammered. It all happens very quickly, but everyone is out in this town square laughing and messing with each other and somehow Chef and Wes get tangled up. I think Chef was trying to give Wes a wedgie???
They start pushing back and forth, Chef has his phone in Wes’ face, Wes smacks it away and it goes flying. Things escalated and got aggressive very quickly. Then Chef throws a punch… at the back of Wes’ head! Hannah is trying to split the whole thing up and that’s where it ends!
Oh God why???!!!! To be continued…