Southern Charm

Southern Charm Episode 13 Finale Recap

Ain’t No Thing Like a Chicken Wing

The season finale that I was not ready for! I felt like this season was just starting to get good and then just like that, it’s over. The Key West trip wraps up without any other major drama or confrontations. Back in Charleston, relationships are being put back together and we tie the season up in a pretty little southern bow.

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The Next Morning

The gang is still in Key West recovering from the night before. Naomi is true to her word and leaves without saying goodbye to Craig. They don’t really explain why or what happened to make her so upset. But then I remembered her saying last episode that she had to leave early to take a test. So this whole time, they’re making us believe that Naomi is storming out because Craig is such as ass when really, the whole thing was planned all along. I see you shady couple.


Shady Lady

Kathryn is talking to the girls about Landon and how she doesn’t trust her apology. She doesn’t think someone can change that fast – um hello, what do you think you are trying to prove you did? Dani tells Kathryn how Landon stood up for her to Thomas.


Meanwhile, Landon and Cameran are talking and Landon does seem pretty upset over the way Thomas was speaking to Kathryn. It’s bringing up a lot of her past issues with her ex.

Dani Misses Dinner

The group heads to dinner on the party bus – except for JD, Shep, Craig, Austen, and Landon who decide to drive scooters to dinner. Great decision guys! Scooters are a must in Key West! Drag show, scooters, and key lime pie are the best things that Key West has to offer!


Kathryn and Thomas talk about seeking mediation to discuss their custody issues instead of continuing to go through the court. It seems to be a nice, genuine conversation – but Kathryn’s no dummy. She knows what she has to do to get back in Thomas’ good graces and she can play that man like a fiddle.


Dani faints and then collapses in the lobby of the restaurant. This was so jarring! She just completely crumpled onto the floor. When the ambulance arrives to take her, she still hasn’t come to so they have to strap her in to the wheelchair – scary! We find out soon that she’s ok and it was just dehydration. That Florida sun is no joke y’all!


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Thomas is being a huge dick to Landon and is disgusted to even sit next to her – all because she stuck up for Kathryn. Ugh God he is so gross!


Craig’s birthday present to Cam is a baby onesie thing that he embroidered. It’s very sweet, but how about a birthday present that’s actually for Cam? My mother always told me, once you have a baby – you’re not the baby anymore. Lame. But Cameran seemed to really love it so well done Craig.


Back to Charleston… for Almost Everyone

The next morning everyone is getting ready to leave – well that was a short boring trip. Y’all need to watch the Beverly Hills ladies in Hong Kong and see how it’s done. Cam and Craig talk about his problems with Naomi. He explains to her how mean Naomi is in private and God he’s making it sound like he’s a battered wife. They cut to her in past clips just pretty much telling him to get his shit together and while it’s a little harsh at times, he is making it sound way worse than it is.

cam and craig

Shep interrupts their convo – he was still a little buzzed when he woke up and decided to just start drinking again. I’ve been there Shep – only takes a few drinks at that point and you’re back to peak drunkenness.


As Jane Austen Said….

Back in Charleston, Thomas has done a complete 180 on Landon. He is so angry that she stood up for Kathryn and revealed her truth self. He says he will never give her the opportunity to date him again. God!!! He is such a douche I can’t even deal. Who talks like that?


Landon on the other hand is also completely done with Thomas as a dating prospect. She is sick of men with money thinking that they can control everything she does. She’s already had that relationship before and doesn’t want it again. I actually agree with her – run Landon! You really dodged a bullet. Having a bridge in the family is not worth that bullshit!


Dr Kat

Kathryn and Naomi meet up – Oh God Kathryn is giving relationship advice! Naomi tells her that basically she likes cutting Craig down, it’s become pretty fun. I mean, the guy’s gotta accept it. If you sit at home embroidering shit all day – be prepared to get made fun of when your hard working girlfriend comes home. Naomi does admit to being really mean to him.

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Should We Just Break Up?

Well her little talk with Kathryn must’ve worked because later on Naomi apologizes to Craig for being mean. Her apology was really nice…until the end when she repeatedly called him an asshole. Wow – that didn’t last long Naomi. I think she was trying to tell him that sometimes it’s his fault too… but harsh.

The way that Craig is responding really sounds like he’s trying to break up with her – until she pretty much begs him not to. I bet she never thought that he would actually do it so she kept pushing and pushing. Again, the whole thing is kinda lackluster for me since we know that they’re still together regardless.

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In the spirit of resolution, Thomas and Kathryn also meet up to talk. Thomas is so obsessed with Kat’s body and the way he describes it is so freaking creepy! Puke in my mouth! They have a super long, super awky hug – but they both love it.


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Finale Party

JD is having a party at his restaurant/bar thing for some unknown reason…I think he’s closing the place but it’s not very clear. Naomi tells every single person one by one that Thomas and Kathryn kissed. It is so ridiculous, she just keeps repeating herself over and over.


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Kathryn shows up and wtf is she wearing??? She must’ve heard that Thomas was quoting Jane Austen and decided to dress up like one of the men from Pride and Prejudice. It really is atrocious!

kat look

Shep brings his ex, Bailey, who is then sort of hitting on Austen and he’s not stopping it. He’s rubbing her back and they are sitting so close and touching – all the while Chelsea is sitting staring them down, just waiting to pounce. I think it was very classy of her not to make a huge scene.


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She waited for Austen to sit next to her and then got gangster on his ass. “Ima tell you one time boy! I will not be made a fool! I took you crabbing and this is how you repay me!”


And Austen is sitting there in shock like wtf Chelsea – you said you didn’t want to be exclusive so which is it? After all that they finally decide to go steady! Aww yay!


Craig decides to be a pot stirrer and starts asking Landon about giving Kathryn a real apology. Landon says she’s fine with how things are – cordial and pleasant, no need to be bffs. This is not acceptable to Craig who cannot get whatever his point is across because Shep keeps cutting him off.


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Shep keeps trying to make intelligent comparisons to the situation i.e. America vs Russia and Bay of Pigs but Craig doesn’t get it…. so Shep is just laughing at him and says maybe he’ll understand a Barney comparison. So condescending Shep.

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Craig is getting more and angrier and keeps threatening to punch Shep in the leg and/or knock him out. Well he finally loses it and sucker punches Shep in the thigh. Wtf Craig? Who the hell punches someone in the leg? What a little bitch!


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Kathryn and Thomas are talking, flirting, touching… gross! Thomas can’t keep his hands off her spandex pants – bleh! She tells him she’ll always love him and that’s how the season ends. That’s it? No shady off screen friend who doesn’t realize their mic is on and says something cray? Boring! So any day now we can expect the announcement of baby number three.


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I hope they still air the reunion next Monday, but I’m thinking that we’ll have to wait 2 weeks because of the holiday. Boo! If history repeats itself, we’ll find out in the reunion that Kathryn and Thomas had a brief reconciliation, but now hate each other – oh yea and she’s preggers again. God I hope that’s not the case! I think she knows better know – and she wants a ring! Depending on when this was filmed, we may get our first peak at pregnant Cam. I’ll be interested to see how Shep and Craig’s relationship is now… I’m sure they worked it out but Craig has really got to be sick of Shep’s crap by now. And also what is the status of Chelsea and Austen?
What did you think of the finale and the season overall? Which relationships will maintain and which will fizzle out? Will Roam ever been launched? (albeit under a different name)

Let me know in the comments below!

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