All Chained Up and No Place to Go
We start this week’s episode with the conclusion of last week’s anchor drama cliffhanger and we end this episode with yet another anchor drama cliffhanger. This team needs to get it together! Captain Lee would not stand for this. He’d be making it rain with plane tickets! Bobby finally gets a gripe and comes down from his Hulk alter-ego, but I doubt that will last long. Episode 1 Episode 2 Episode 3
Anchor Dram Round 1
Poor Max is still out to sea, floating around on this little tinder and scratching his head trying to figure out what to do. I was pretty confused too about how this little blowup toy could push a mega yacht and I thought for sure we were about to see Max get squished. After a lot of coxing from the Captain, Max drives the tinder into the front of the yacht and it actually seems to work. He’s able to push it away enough that the crew can reset the anchors and the boat is away from the rocks. Hero Maxie is quite proud of himself for saving the day and for now, crisis is avoided.
Bobby Tries to Redeem Himself
Bobby is bored and lonely and this finally makes him feel remorseful for the way he treated Hannah. The way he initially expresses his remorse to Hannah is by creepily staring at her while she’s trying to eat her breakfast… so weird.
They have a talk and he sort of apologizes but then says that he wishes Hannah would’ve made it more clear that Lauren was lying. Uh, Hannah had repeatedly told you that she never said those things to Lauren, only the 3 dates thing. Doesn’t that mean Lauren was lying? Lauren came out and admitted that she way lying! You need Hannah to come straight out with it and call Lauren a liar to get it? This is all setting up Lauren to be the new bad guy and now Bobby can target one specific person to be a dick to.
Speaking of Lauren, she has gone to the dark side and is getting completely emo over this whole Bobby sitch. She is ironing and crying, folding and crying, cleaning and crying like a crazy person! She is super paranoid that everyone is talking about her and that Bobby is soiling her name. Um, no one is talking about you Lauren, calm the blank down.
She legit says “Why is this happening to me?” (I’m surprised this wasn’t followed by an “I’m a good person” line) to Bugsy, whose grandmother just died you insensitive bitch. Nothing is happening to you Lauren, you are just super overly dramatic. The way she’s reacting to absolutely nothing and creating drama out of thin error makes me think she did lie to Bobby about Hannah talking shit.
Dirty Dinner Party
Captain Sandy has dinner with Mr. Skin and his guests. He explains to her how he got his pervy start. Pretty much he has always been a prev. When he was a kid he started recording the nude scenes in movies and put them all on one tape… gross. Who has that much time on their hands, even as a child? Where were your parents? Do some homework! Play a sport!
Chef what’s his face is started to lose his cool during dinner. He gets very snippy with Hannah and then can’t figure out how to work fondant when trying to create the tittie cakes.
The crew dresses up in these muscle/bikini graphic tees that I unfortunately see quite a lot of living in Florida. Well, Mr. Skin – being the tacky man that he is – absolutely looooved the tee shirts. Standing ovation.
Malia was supposed to be on anchor watch all night but she was helping with dinner service for most of it, while the Captain was at dinner. They kept flashing to the empty bridge.
The next morning when they raise the anchor, the chain is completely tangled sooo badly. It is just a huge knot.
The team is getting frustrated while trying to untangle this thing. Bobby tries to tell the Captain what to do and she mutters under her breath that he knows nothing. Ha! She also tells him “stand back wittle baby Bobby if you’re gonna be such a huge pussy.” Not an exact quote but close! This really ticks him off and he starts giving major attitude and back talking to the Captain!!! He would never be acting this way to Captain Lee or any male captain for that matter.
Wes is swimming around in the water, while Malia and Max stand on the deck looking super clueless. Even after the Captain tells them exactly what to do they’re both like uhhhh…. Where did they find this season’s cast, Abercrombie and Fitch?
8 hours later, the chain is still not untangled and Malia is like “later bitches, I’m going swimming.” Uh Malia, I’m pretty sure all of this is your fault in the first place! The boat was spinning and making the chains tangled while you were supposed to be making sure that exact thing didn’t happen. Why has no one brought this up?
There is no preview for next week… Are they trying to make us think that maybe they had to cut the chain and that the charter season is really over? Somehow, I don’t see that happening. I still can’t decide who is getting more camera time this season for all of their drama – Bobby or the anchor? But I do know that Lauren wishes it was her. What do you think of the season so far and of this episode? Too much anchor/Bobby drama or is it keeping it interesting? Is Lauren a total attention whore or is being picked on? Let me know in the comments below! Episode 1 Episode 2 Episode 3