Who’s the Boss?
Below Deck Med is back and this time sailing through Croatia. Hannah and Bobby are both returning from last year. Besides that, pretty much everyone else has heavy accents and we need subtitle in order to understand them.
We have a new chef, who unfortunately is not Chef Ben. Hopefully we’ll have another “Leon situation” on our hands and Ben will show up mid-season.
She is super obsessed with the crew getting rest. One of the first things out of her mouth is “I’m not a micromanager”, which means she’s totally going to be a micromanager.
He’s pretty cute but doesn’t seem nearly as charming as Ben, but I’m biased.
Hannah – Chief Stew
Hannah says she is trying to be softer this year but already in this episode we see her wanting to explode.
Bugsy – Stew 1
The first we see of Bugsy is her struggling to figure out how to open a door. “Bugsy” seems like an appropriate nickname as it kind of matches her face. She’s normally a chef stew but decided to take a break and step down to a stewardess so I’m sure she’ll have plenty of input regarding Hannah.
Lauren – Stew 2
Lauren is a former NFL cheerleader, but not the slutty kind…. She used to date Bobby so this ought to be interesting.
Wes – Boson
Well Wes seems like a real bad ass. One time he got caught drinking at school! Damn bad boy! What a rebel! Bobby keeps calling Wes, “Wis” and it’s hilarious!
Bobby – Deckhand
Bobby is back with braces and maybe even more tattoos. His mission is still to find someone to love him.
Max – Deckhand
We are going to need a lot of subtitles for this kid. He has a cockney accent that’s like British hillbilly sounding and really difficult to understand. He literally says, “I’m not the most smartest of people.” Obvs
Malia – Deckhand
This girl is super gorgeous but has never worked on a yacht before, only dive boats. She has 5 older brothers so she’s gonna be that “I’m one of the guys” types.
The Chef Adam sits down with Captain Sandy and she’s going over all of her rules and expectations. Chef Adam then asks “Are you the first mate?” Ahh so awky!
The Captain gathers the group to let them know that’s she’s seen it all: Meltdowns, fires, pirates chase her. She also lays out the rules: no drinking and a curfew to ensure lots of rest.
The captain is already on Hannah’s ass and wants her to have the entire boat cleaned and organized by 9pm. Hannah quite blantantly says that it’s not gonna happen so the Captain decides to jump in. What?! Hilarious!
Surprise, surprise the boat is not ready by 9pm curfew. There are boxes all around and the Captain wants to just shove them in the closet. Hannah is staying up preparing as the Captain stands over her telling her to go to bed over and over. Hannah already so close to losing it on this Captain.
The first charter guests call themselves “The Tribe.” They have a ton of dietary restrictions but also want a “tribal themed” dinner. Wtf is that?
The guests arrive and are super excited about the work out equipment. Who the fuck works out on vacation?! Some people are just sick. Chef Adam is putting post it notes on the plates of the guests. Uhh.. gross. The boat starts to float away because the anchors are not strong enough to hold the boat in the wind. This incident pleases Hannah because it will keep the Captain off her ass. She can’t wipe the smile of her face.
The guests decide to stay up drinking espresso martinis – which Hannah makes decaf. They are drinking and drinking which leads to the late night munchies. One particularly drunk guest requests nacho – meat nachos – Hannah is just staring at her like, you fake vegetarian bitch. She wakes up the Chef who is equally shocked that these “vegetarians” want a huge plate of mean nachos. Drunk bitches.
The Captain is all over everyone’s asses as they’re trying to set up a beach picnic. The deckhands are getting all the water toys out and the Captain keeps grabbing things out of their hands and doing it herself. Malia is trying to figure out the tinder and the Captain decides that this is the perfect time to train her. She makes her drive around in circles while everyone is waiting on the beach and the guests are waiting for lunch. Hannah is about to blow and I can’t wait to see that happen.
The season looks pretty action packed: lots of hook ups and swapping around, a few injuries, lots of damage to the boat, and drunken fights. Can’t wait!
What did you think of the 1st episode of Below Deck Med? Is Hannah gonna have a freak out on Captain Sandy? Who will be hooking up with who?
Let me know in the comments below!